3 ways to know if "gay" men are cruising


men cruising

Men Cruising 101

Oh my goodness guys! So, the other day I was chatting with my boo Adam and he told me about what he calls “cruisers” in the men's locker room. I was shook, because for me the men’s locker room has always been a place that you should spend minimal time in and not make eye contact with anyone. Maybe this was due to the fact that I was a scrawny teenager in high school with the word gay practically written on my forehead. It was the early 2000’s back when gay shaming was a thing, so I got picked on a lot. Anyway, I seemed to have repeated this same “get out quick” mentality in the locker room at the gym even now as an adult. With that said, I am completely oblivious of what's happening around me.


One day we both went to the gym together and Adam advised me that there was a man totally staring at me and “cruising hard”. I was like “what do you mean, weirdo?” He said the gentleman showed all the signs and that I should really open my eyes a little and find out for myself. I am a grown ass man now and have a bit of weight to throw around if I got in any scuffle. I took on this new mantra of being more present while in the locker room but not coming off creepy. Girl, it was crazy what I observed and have decided to share with you all the ways I have determined a man may be cruising you in the gym locker room.



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1. Men who cruise may give you a deep stare in the eyes

He stares at you quite a bit and follows you around. Once I opened myself up to the idea of actually keeping an eye out, I realized there were a few men who seemed to stare at me in the locker room. One college-age guy even seemed to follow me around a bit and that was a little weird, I must say. But I’m not talking a glance, I am talking a stare that lasts quite a while and has a sort of intent behind it. The intent is really clear if he keeps staring while you change which is what happened with the college kid. I took a pic to show you this look

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2. "Gay" men cruising may be peeping toms

He tries to sneak a peek or even gives you a peek. I have had both of these situations happen to me. Once when I was in the steam room enjoying some eucalyptus and relaxing my sore muscles, I noticed this older married dad was sprawled out across from me with a towel draped over his thighs. I had seen this man a bunch of times dropping off his kids at the daycare in the gym and always admired his commitment to fitness, I even said to Adam that “I hope when I am a dad that I look like that.” Anyway, I didn't think anything of it as I would have never suspected what would happen next. He began to sort of wipe or caress the sweat from his chest and repeatedly touched his package through the towel. I was like “OMG is this happening right now” lol. Indeed it was, he saw me glance through the steam at him and pulled that towel right off to wipe the sweat from his face exposing himself in all his glory if you know what I mean. He must have liked that I was looking, shame on me for looking, but if you saw him you’d have looked too! Once the steam turned on again I looked up and realized he was standing right infront of me touching himself. At that moment the door opened and I was saved from the situation. I still avoid “daddy” to this day as lord knows what might happen if I am ever in that tempting situation again. The second time I had a gentleman peek through the crack of a shower stall which leads me to the third way a man is cruising. (this picture is my best effort to be a peeping tom hahaha)

gay public cruising

3. "Gay" hookups happen in the showers

If he gives you an indication in the shower stall next door. I was taking a shower recently at the gym and noticed the feet of the guy next to me were facing my direction and the shadow on the floor, it appeared to have a stroking movement. You all know what I am talking about, we are all adults here lol. I then saw a small gap separating our shower stalls and realized he was peeping through at me. I was horrified as I have a whole routine that includes all kinds of hair products and sometimes scrubs, but that did not seem to bother him lol. When he saw that I noticed he backed away, but curiosity killed the cat and I just had to take a little look myself because I had to see who it was. Curiosity killed the cat, I guess. To my surprise, it was a military man I had seen in the gym many times and he was really excited to see that I looked. I was like “OMG James why the f*#k did you look”. Next thing I knew his hand popped under that stall and waved me over as to say “let me touch you” and then did a sort of stroking gesture. Y'all, I did not know what to do, I was pleased it was a cute guy but I panicked, shut off the water, grabbed my towel, and got the heck out of there. I like my gym and I am a local business owner so I am not about to go there! Plus, I’m taken. Needless to say, I only shower at the gym when I absolutely have too now.

The Conclusion of men cruising

So, if a man is staring deeply in your eyes like he wants to ravage you, peeping on you, or signaling you in the shower or other private areas; he's probably cruising for sex. I thought I would share these things with y'all because maybe you are curious or looking to recognize “the cruise” so you can be a step ahead of the game and avoid it like I do (as tempting as it is sometimes lol) OR maybe you are looking to confirm if you've been cruised OR maybe you want to be the one to cruise (no judgment)!?

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